I was watching a show on PBS about ancient chariots. There were three people working together with their expertise trying to recreate the chariots that the Egyptians made for battle back in Bible times.
They did fairly well at first but the problem lay in the harnesses for the horses pulling the chariot. I was thinking how "in time" those horses must be in order to successfully pull that chariot - especially in the area of a battle.
Boy, isn't that like marriage? It can be tough working in a harness together. I'm the brown horse; he's the black. I mean everything is totally opposite for us - can it get any harder? LOL!
Yet, it was crucial that those horses pull together. It was life and death crucial. If those horses didn't work together, the rider would most likely be dead in a very short time.
And if we don't work together in our marriages, our marriages could suffer sudden death.
Child rearing is an area you must work together. In most mom-dad scenarios, you got the softie and the hard core parent. The longer you work together and give and take, you will most likely find yourself balancing out. I was the hard core mom and he was the softie dad. But, I think after parenting 13 years so far...I am easing up in areas and he is getting tougher in other areas. And our kids benefit from us parenting together.
What about money? Yikes, that can be a doosy if you don't pull as a team. And boy, have we worked and worked on this one. I remember when we first were married. Christmas needed to be big. Mainly because my mother-in-law did not celebrate Christmas and he didn't have a lot of memories associated with Christmas. So he wanted to make it big and awesome. It was hard when you want to make them happy but you need to make good decisions too. So now, he is willing to stick with a budget - and I give enough on my end to make it fairly generous.
There are so many things I could keep talking about. What is it that I need to work on? Can you think of something you need to work on as well?
We could all use a time of buckling our harnesses and learning how to grow and learn together. I can't always be the one with all the right ideas and he can't either.
Once those people adjusted the harnesses right, those horses started pulling together and it all came together as it should.
So, create a plan. That's your harness. You need a plan for child rearing. You need a plan for your finances. You need a plan for every area.
Then put that plan into action and start working together. If you hit conflict, remind yourselves, stick to the plan! Yes, you may have to readjust that plan occasionally. But most of the time, you just stick with it and work together.
And you will see you will be the ones winning in the battles just like Pharoah in that chariot.
Once those people adjusted the harnesses right, those horses started pulling together and it all came together as it should.
So, create a plan. That's your harness. You need a plan for child rearing. You need a plan for your finances. You need a plan for every area.
Then put that plan into action and start working together. If you hit conflict, remind yourselves, stick to the plan! Yes, you may have to readjust that plan occasionally. But most of the time, you just stick with it and work together.
And you will see you will be the ones winning in the battles just like Pharoah in that chariot.
