Sunday night, my girls were sitting with me on the couch and they began to ask me questions about when they were babies after I showed them the above picture. This is our Summer and Autumn.
Who was the cutest? Who was the funniest? Of course, everyone loves to hear stories about themselves and it is fun to reminisce.
My husband was listening to us and suddenly jumps up and goes to the hall closet. He brings back our ancient video camera (that we bought back in 2001!) and our old home movies. We laughed until the tears rolled down our faces. Our babies back then...now teenagers. It was so much fun!
My husband then put in our wedding video. We couldn't remember when the last time was that we had watched it...it had definitely been a few years! I was sitting on the floor and Sierra came to sit on my lap. I had my arms around her and my husband came and sat behind me...his arms wrapped around me. We sat there and watched as we said our vows and then it went to our reception and then to our honeymoon to Gatlinburg.
As I watched the old home movies, I thought...Boy, weren't we happy? Are we that happy today? Well, we all want to think we live happily ever after when in reality...that is an unrealistic expectation.
I'm reading a book for the second time called Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy?
Wow. I have read many books on marriage but I believe this one is probably number one on my list that has been the most convicting. And just what I need.
One of the best pieces of advice I have taken away from this book is believing that much of the dissatisfaction we experience in marriage comes from expecting too much from it. We are asking each other to fill a spiritual craving and emptiness that they can not do. We are seeking a person that will never let us down...love us with a perfect love...always be truthful...be the person we can look at with utmost respect...and friends, that can never be in a human relationship.
So in all fairness, we need to stop expecting from our spouses. We need to work on ourselves and the only relationship that will fill that hole of longing deep inside us...let's work on our relationship with our Savior.
So, I'm watching us on the movie and realized...yep, we were the same old sinners we are now. We had the same struggles and sins. He wasn't a better husband back then than he is now. And I'm definitely not a better wife.
Then why do we get in these moments of frustration, dissatisfaction, hopelessness, anger at our marriage and our spouses? Because we are expecting too much.
This is something that is a huge struggle for me. I am working on it continually. I hope in some way that you will be encouraged to do the same.
Keep the real reason of marriage in front of you!
"A magnificent marriage begins not with knowing one another but with knowing Christ."
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